So I met a schoolfriend who used to tease me for being effeminate in a gay bar...
 

You know how when you were at school you weren't a particularly good judge of character, and put up with hanging around with some total little shites? Well, I certainly did. I used to have a schoolfriend when I was 13/14 that sort of age, and he was such a little bastard, he constantly teased me for being small, effeminate and generally likely to immerge as a homosexual (actually I'm bisexual so he was only half right- ha!). Well last night I bumped into him, after almost 5 years of not speaking too him, in a gay bar. And he is a raging homosexual.
But it gets better. I used too have another mate, his best friend, who was just as guilty for thinning that oh-so-thin line between friend and bully. In year 9 (age 14) I stopped hanging around with both of them because they were blantant twats. Within a year of this, they fucked eachothers little lights out. Ha ha, you couldn't make this shit up, truth can be stranger than fiction, and I fucking love it.

The universe delivers another cosmic win.

hahah.

it's the stuff the best gay porn is made of.

I sort of agree, but not with these two guys, seriously. When I found out I didn't know whether too laugh or puke.

I think gay males might have more trouble going out of the closet than lesbians. It's a funny story, not strange at all.

It depends who your friends are. And within our group at the time, the only two people who'd react badly to someone coming out of the closet was, seemingly, them.

they are pathetic self-hating queers, probably they won't be able to cope with the joyous celebration that is being openly homosexual (at least if you are as hot as me), so eventually they'll end up in the army, where they will have to hide their queer tendencies even more, and finally get queer-bashed by a fellow soldier for silently rubbing themselves against him at night.

i think you mean the opposite.

I wouldn't know, I'm a girl so the boy world is something I've never experienced and making a judgement would be hypocritical. I thought about school and how boys would pick up fights with boys and girls would pick up fights with girls... but yeah, going deeper into that would be sexist.

ha ha ha! That is something I would not be adverse to happening after several years of bullying. Well it can be a big deal coming out, only the geezer I met has come out, the guy he fucked hasn't yet. I notice a degree of playful resentment when I met gay guys and tell them I'm bi, I reckon because they either think I'm a half-way-out-of-the-closet gay who just can't admit it, or they resent that I can still have some man-flesh whilst not having to come out quite as dramatically as a gay guy does, and I avoid all the problems that could come with that. Generally, I've got the vibe that alot of gay guys don't consider being bi as a legitimate sexuality.

Yeah, i've seen gay guys giving bi's the cold shoulder many times, for some reason. It's even more surprising considering that your average scene-gay male is nothing short of a slut, all too often. Unless the bi dude hides it, which i think might be often the case. it's very difficult to tell with people. A few weeks ago a bricklayer who, bless him, has to travel all the way to london for some cock, hit on me. Obviously nothing happened, first of all because i like to tease the world with my pretty face, second because i didn't fancy him, and third because he told me that he's married, has kids, and he's not a bummer. Sad life.

Yeah I recently slept with a bi guy who has a girlfriend he "cares about very much". It's no open relationship, and he obviously was willing to put aside his faithfulness to the girl he loves for a bit of cock, and I suspect it has to do with more than just my transcendant beauty and massive phallus. So yeah, it is hard too tell with people, you're right. But I am actually very assured of my sexuality and too be told I'm just not admitting too something is quite offensive.

Most abusive or violent homophobes are troubled individuals who cannot face up to their own sexuality, and instead of self abusing, take it out on others..

in the case of that bricklayer i had feeling he might be a wife beater, so you're right.

I'd rather they took it out on others rather than the other option too be honest, even if it is me.

I love moments like that.

You don't get nearly enough of them in life, really.

The same thing happened to a friend's gay uncle, actually.

Yeah, I've known quite a few "gay" guys who'd have the occasional sex with a female and explain it off as something that only happened because they were drunk (so drunk they apparently didn't notice anything missing!) I'm sure there are as many bi males who hide it in the gay community as there are in the straight world

It's different with girls though. A lot of hetero girls think it's cool to be bi, and the fact that hetero male porn celebrates it has a lot to do with that. Of course in the lesbian community, being bi is considered just about as bad as it is in the fag scene. It's definitely silly that after all this time of pushing that people accept that sexuality is not a choice, a lot of queers come down on bi people as if they had a choice.

I'm really quite sick of the definities of gay bi etc communities. When can people relax and fuck as people and not because they satisfy so much needless catergorizing, as if it really matters what file you put it under when youve actually found something that feels good, in a world that will do anything to make you feel bad .

Its truly difficult and dismaying to hear from marrrasses and this isnts accounts of folks whove had to deal with what happens in a world where things are not as simple as such.

Hmm, speaking for myself - people's sexuality is always in flux, and without going into personal details here, mine shifts around quite a lot. I'm pretty happy with it now, tbh, and anyway, the idea of someone being utterly hetero or gay is ridiculous.

maybe it'd be boring?

Nefeli - Well, I should clarify - I mean more the idea of someone saying either "I'm totally straight, and am going to act in a way that proves it to the world", or "I'm totally gay, and etc etc". It's not the state of sexuality that I'm referring to, more (like porky) the way that sexuality is portrayed. To me, aggressive homosexuality is equally as off-putting as aggressive heterosexuality.

I want to spend all your money... at the gay bar gay bar gay bar.

I have no money - will you accept Luncheon Vouchers instead?

I totally agree with this Melly, well put.

The irony for me is, if the accusation that is levelled against bisexuals by some homosexuals is that we have all of the fun and none of the prejudice, if we continue to get cold shouldered by these guys (which I flatly refuse to put up with anymore) or they refuse to legitimize our sexuality then they're balancing that out of us quite nicely themselves, aren't they?

well a lot of straight people would agree with them, you're just a bunch of greedy, indecisive, untrustworthy, wishy-washy bastards.

i accept Visa, Mastercard, etc.

i know a gay guy who is proud of the fact that he cans educe lesbians. yeah.

You made a point I agree with, and one I don't. I'm sure that if I was to convince a straight male to have sex with me (regardless of the quality), there is a not so strange possibility that they could even enjoy penetration, as we are 'sexual' beings, like we often say. On the other hand what makes humans different from animals is the fact that we are capable of thinking rationally and know what we like best, therefore we set clear boundaries that indicate what we prefer and stick to.

I am not greedy. I may be bi but I still find 0.1% of the population fuckable. I am neither indecisive or wishy-washy, I am very assured of my sexuality even if no one else is, if I had to pick to be either gay or straight I know I would loose a large part of my character, so to be told that I am just not admitting something, or indeed any of your above statement, is actually highly offensive.

i'm effiminate in a gay bar all the time. no biggie. just keep your head up. and reachin' for the stars or some shit?

I think you misread the title of this thread sweetie.

I meant "I met a schoolfriend who used to to tease me for being effeminate, in a gar bar..."

i get teased for being a totally effiminate floozy in gay bars! how did i misread?!

Add to that mentally draining when you have friends who act/think that way. I can't really say what it's like for lesbians, but the few I know - unless they're bulldog dykes - seem to be in more 'stable' relationships.

This is not to say that there are not gay male relationships out there which work out for the best, it's the whole flirting, approach, and self-pity that putting massive emphasis on your sexuality comports when you are socialising with other gay males.

Male gays all too often are incapable of just going out, having a few beers, without retaining the mindset of someone who is waiting 'for something to happen'. Females are generally more relaxed, be they straight or gay, so they tend to work out things in more natural and less neurotic ways that often don't make them jump to quick conclusions which are heavily influenced by the sexual outcome of their sleeping around with someone.

Part of that I think happens because males are males, wether one likes it or not sex is one way most of us define our status. In the gay male psyche it's a mixture of severe insecurity masked by repressed sexuality which goes on to overshadow the little of worth someone might have to show to society. Hence the super-fast prolification of 'gay counselling' that do work for some individuals, but ultimatly detract a big amount of confidence from an individual because they seem to put the spotlight on his/her 'gay problems'.

If you think of yourself as being just a gay, rather than an individulal whose sexuality happens to be homo, don't be surprised if you end up a bundle of gay insecurity/anxiety/social inadequacy.

aggresive heterosexuality defines me.I can assume for certain 100% i'm never ever going to have sex under any circumstances with a man.
unless he's really really hot.
then i might get all horney again..
bah.

I'm a relaxed homosexual, and I never had the urge of being aggressive to a hairy inflatable doll. Do I win?

Agreed. At age 16 I discovered I love the cock and have stuck to it ever since.

So now...